I know I'm not the only one, but I have the flu. I've had it in one form or another for about a week now. It started with the itchy throat and peaked at a fever of 102 a couple of nights ago. Because I am bionic (read: a stupid man)I have not taken any time off from work and haven't really taken any medicine other than a mega-dose of vitamins and Tylenol for the pain in my bones.
Why? Because I am a dingbat, obviously. Even God took a day of rest after creating the heavens and the earth, so what makes me think I can get by without rest? The good thing is I did sleep fairly well last night, so it helps.
When we talk about work-life balance, we tend to think of it in terms of working and then spending time with loved ones. This is by far the most important aspect of it, but we also need to take time for ourselves. It's important to just rest, to sleep, read a book, watch an old movie. In short, we must disconnect from the reality of the world or the reality of the world will overwhelm us. I believe I got this flu mostly because of the stress I've been under. No one can blame me. However, when we don't keep the stress in check, we could easily trade in the flu for something infinitely more serious. Worth it? Oh, no. Not at all.
So when you plan out your day, your week, or your month, set aside quality time with your family, and a little for yourself. Get your rest, drink water, eat veggies... you know the drill.
Remember:
- Get your rest.
- Laugh.
- Be with the people you love and tell them you love them.
- If you didn't go back to work Monday, for whatever reason, your inbox will still be full.
Make it your best day yet. The only way to make it so is with friends and family. God bless you and yours.
- Adolfo
Saturday, February 12, 2011
Friday, February 11, 2011
Day 264 - Renewal
It's been a rough ride for my family the last month. It's safe to say January - February 2011 will be remembered, and not fondly.
But there is a limit to everything, and as my sister put it: God never gives you everything at once. This applies not only to the bad, but to the good as well. We simply couldn't handle it and He never gives us more than we can handle.
Death is a part of life, it's the one guarantee besides taxes. We will all face it at one time or another, even if only our own. Those of us who are blessed with lots of friends and relatives will have to face it even more. The pain is proportionate to the joy.
But a moment comes where you have to resolve to move forward. It's not easy. There is so much emotion involved, but you do a disservice to the departed when you allow the pain and sadness to linger. They can't see you or influence you, but if they could, they would tell you it's time to move on.
This is something that applies not only to losing loved ones, but to all the hurts, big and small, that we experience in our lifetimes. You will be hurt. You will be disappointed, betrayed. It comes with the territory when you interact with other human beings. You can't control that. What you can control is how you react to these slights. Grieve, or scream, or yell, if you must, then move on.
I allowed the pain of losing people I love affect me very much. Enough that I have a cold (or flu) and am having even more trouble sleeping than usual. I resolve to end this foolishness. Not that it's foolish to mourn, but it's foolish to allow yourself to be consumed.
I don't want to promise you or myself that I will write every day like I used to, but I will try, knowing that I eventually will.
God bless you. Make it your best day yet.
- Adolfo
But there is a limit to everything, and as my sister put it: God never gives you everything at once. This applies not only to the bad, but to the good as well. We simply couldn't handle it and He never gives us more than we can handle.
Death is a part of life, it's the one guarantee besides taxes. We will all face it at one time or another, even if only our own. Those of us who are blessed with lots of friends and relatives will have to face it even more. The pain is proportionate to the joy.
But a moment comes where you have to resolve to move forward. It's not easy. There is so much emotion involved, but you do a disservice to the departed when you allow the pain and sadness to linger. They can't see you or influence you, but if they could, they would tell you it's time to move on.
This is something that applies not only to losing loved ones, but to all the hurts, big and small, that we experience in our lifetimes. You will be hurt. You will be disappointed, betrayed. It comes with the territory when you interact with other human beings. You can't control that. What you can control is how you react to these slights. Grieve, or scream, or yell, if you must, then move on.
I allowed the pain of losing people I love affect me very much. Enough that I have a cold (or flu) and am having even more trouble sleeping than usual. I resolve to end this foolishness. Not that it's foolish to mourn, but it's foolish to allow yourself to be consumed.
I don't want to promise you or myself that I will write every day like I used to, but I will try, knowing that I eventually will.
God bless you. Make it your best day yet.
- Adolfo
Sunday, February 6, 2011
Day 259 - An Open Letter to Vicky and Danny
Yesterday, we spent the day at the funeral of your parents. Surrounded by people who loved them, people they loved, and pictures of the great times and memories of their lives, we silently paid tribute to two people who were angels among us and have been elevated to be angels above us.
I would be lying if I told you I understand what the two of you are going through. No one knows. All anyone can ever do is try to understand, or at least listen, and respond with love. We can try to understand this and never will. I have learned that while all things are, in their own way, beautiful, they are not always pretty. The loss of your parents has affected me in the following way: it has increased and strengthened my faith in God. I can't explain why this has been the result, but I can tell you I have never felt closer to God, and I hope that when the pain you are feeling has subsided, and the healing power of time has taken effect, you too will be able to say that this painful chapter served to bring you closer to God. Your parents are with Him now, being closer to Him, will bring you closer to them.
We all have a limited time on this planet. The measure of our success as people is not the years of our lives, but the life in our years. By this or any measure, your parents lived extraordinary lives. If the success of a life is determined by the legacy one creates, again your parents aced the test. How can I say this? Because of the amazing people they created and left to us. Watching the two of you sit there, in all your pain as people came by was heartbreaking. Listening to you comforting those who came to you was inspiring. You two became my heros yesterday.
Vicky, you have inspired me since the first time I held you. You were a week old. It was Christmas morning. You were placed in my arms. I kissed your little face and held you and I fell in love. Holding you that day was as touching to me as the first time I held each of my own children. I didn't know it then, but the lens of time has shown me that the tears I cried upon holding you in my arms that morning were God's way of telling me how special you are.
Danny, you have always made me (and everyone else) laugh. From the time you were a baby, you always had that same smile on that same handsome face and you were always the good times guy. You were always bold and tough, but as sweet a human being as anyone has ever met. In a world where more and more people seem to be lost and all about themselves, it's good to see the man you've become. It's impressive that at your tender age, you are the rock your mother was and the gentleman your father was. Amazing.
While the road ahead is long, you will not walk it alone. You are surrounded by people who love you and will support you every step of the way. Your friends and your family will always be nearby, not only to lend you strength when you need it, but to lend a shoulder or a laugh. I can't speak for others, but I can assure you that I will also be around to be inspired by your strength. I will be there when Vicky walks again and this time, I'll let her carry me.
The bible tells us that while not all things are good, all things work together for good for those who believe. I believe this is true. In your eulogy, Vicky, you said that the last three weeks of your parents' lives were the best of their lives. How wonderful. While this end wasn't what any of us would have planned or wanted, it's comforting to know how happy they were when God called them home. It's comforting to know they were as happy as they deserved to be. It's comforting for the two of you and the rest of us to remember the manner in which they lived their lives, and not the manner in which their lives ended. In the end, all we have are the memories and the moments. The laughter and the tears. The sunshine, the rain, the love. Let us not live with regret, but with fond remembrance of those we were blessed to have known. Let us not live with anger over what we have lost, but with happiness and appreciation for what we were given.
As I close this letter, I realize how inadequate my words are. I understand that what I am feeling is not what you are reading here. This is about the only thing I understand. Another thing I understand is that when trying to communicate, it is sometimes better to use someone else's words. So I want to share with you one of my favorite poems:
INVICTUS
By William Ernest Henley
Out of the night that covers me,
Black as the Pit from pole to pole,
I thank whatever gods may be
For my unconquerable soul.
In the fell clutch of circumstance
I have not winced nor cried aloud.
Under the bludgeonings of chance
My head is bloody, but unbowed.
Beyond this place of wrath and tears
Looms but the Horror of the shade,
And yet the menace of the years
Finds, and shall find, me unafraid.
It matters not how strait the gate,
How charged with punishments the scroll.
I am the master of my fate:
I am the captain of my soul.
Henley wrote this poem while laying in a hospital bed recovering from an amputation. He went on to live a complete and full life. The poem has inspired me for years and I hope it will do the same for you.
Remember my cousins, that no matter how hard it may seem, there is always hope, because there is always God, and family, and love. I know that at this moment the future seems uncertain and even frightening, the unknown always does. But God is with you. We are with you. Your parent's memories and spirits are with us all. We are strong. We are unconquerable.
I love you. God bless you.
Adolfo
I would be lying if I told you I understand what the two of you are going through. No one knows. All anyone can ever do is try to understand, or at least listen, and respond with love. We can try to understand this and never will. I have learned that while all things are, in their own way, beautiful, they are not always pretty. The loss of your parents has affected me in the following way: it has increased and strengthened my faith in God. I can't explain why this has been the result, but I can tell you I have never felt closer to God, and I hope that when the pain you are feeling has subsided, and the healing power of time has taken effect, you too will be able to say that this painful chapter served to bring you closer to God. Your parents are with Him now, being closer to Him, will bring you closer to them.
We all have a limited time on this planet. The measure of our success as people is not the years of our lives, but the life in our years. By this or any measure, your parents lived extraordinary lives. If the success of a life is determined by the legacy one creates, again your parents aced the test. How can I say this? Because of the amazing people they created and left to us. Watching the two of you sit there, in all your pain as people came by was heartbreaking. Listening to you comforting those who came to you was inspiring. You two became my heros yesterday.
Vicky, you have inspired me since the first time I held you. You were a week old. It was Christmas morning. You were placed in my arms. I kissed your little face and held you and I fell in love. Holding you that day was as touching to me as the first time I held each of my own children. I didn't know it then, but the lens of time has shown me that the tears I cried upon holding you in my arms that morning were God's way of telling me how special you are.
Danny, you have always made me (and everyone else) laugh. From the time you were a baby, you always had that same smile on that same handsome face and you were always the good times guy. You were always bold and tough, but as sweet a human being as anyone has ever met. In a world where more and more people seem to be lost and all about themselves, it's good to see the man you've become. It's impressive that at your tender age, you are the rock your mother was and the gentleman your father was. Amazing.
While the road ahead is long, you will not walk it alone. You are surrounded by people who love you and will support you every step of the way. Your friends and your family will always be nearby, not only to lend you strength when you need it, but to lend a shoulder or a laugh. I can't speak for others, but I can assure you that I will also be around to be inspired by your strength. I will be there when Vicky walks again and this time, I'll let her carry me.
The bible tells us that while not all things are good, all things work together for good for those who believe. I believe this is true. In your eulogy, Vicky, you said that the last three weeks of your parents' lives were the best of their lives. How wonderful. While this end wasn't what any of us would have planned or wanted, it's comforting to know how happy they were when God called them home. It's comforting to know they were as happy as they deserved to be. It's comforting for the two of you and the rest of us to remember the manner in which they lived their lives, and not the manner in which their lives ended. In the end, all we have are the memories and the moments. The laughter and the tears. The sunshine, the rain, the love. Let us not live with regret, but with fond remembrance of those we were blessed to have known. Let us not live with anger over what we have lost, but with happiness and appreciation for what we were given.
As I close this letter, I realize how inadequate my words are. I understand that what I am feeling is not what you are reading here. This is about the only thing I understand. Another thing I understand is that when trying to communicate, it is sometimes better to use someone else's words. So I want to share with you one of my favorite poems:
INVICTUS
By William Ernest Henley
Out of the night that covers me,
Black as the Pit from pole to pole,
I thank whatever gods may be
For my unconquerable soul.
In the fell clutch of circumstance
I have not winced nor cried aloud.
Under the bludgeonings of chance
My head is bloody, but unbowed.
Beyond this place of wrath and tears
Looms but the Horror of the shade,
And yet the menace of the years
Finds, and shall find, me unafraid.
It matters not how strait the gate,
How charged with punishments the scroll.
I am the master of my fate:
I am the captain of my soul.
Henley wrote this poem while laying in a hospital bed recovering from an amputation. He went on to live a complete and full life. The poem has inspired me for years and I hope it will do the same for you.
Remember my cousins, that no matter how hard it may seem, there is always hope, because there is always God, and family, and love. I know that at this moment the future seems uncertain and even frightening, the unknown always does. But God is with you. We are with you. Your parent's memories and spirits are with us all. We are strong. We are unconquerable.
I love you. God bless you.
Adolfo
Tuesday, February 1, 2011
Days 253 & 254 - Pop Culture
I set out to avoid news for a year. It was easy to do. I just didn't watch, read, or listen to any news. It isn't a true addiction like alcohol or drugs, so there are no withdrawal symptoms, no urge to break into your house to steal enough money for a hot copy of USA Today (not real news but you get the point.)
I do, however, make contact with the news. For example, there is no way to not know what's happening in Egypt right now. Give them democracy, I say. Don't worry if it's new to them, they'll figure out what to do with it. We all deserve a chance to be free.
I also found, and read, an article about the most disliked figures in Sports. Al Davis, owner of the Oakland Raiders, tops the list. Michael Vick is up there next to him and Tiger Woods is number four. My question is: who cares?
Tiger Woods is disliked because he is losing. Sure, he cheated on his wife. So did Kobe Bryant. The difference is, Kobe has added some jewelry to his collection, so all is forgiven. Tiger hasn't been so lucky, or focused, or whatever. He'll be back, and he'll be off the list.
Donald Trump once wrote that while people love a hero, they love a fallen hero even more. He may have been right. Why do we love to see successful people stumble? Is it envy? Do we see a little of our own failures in their story? Do we need to be reminded that the glitterati are human?
I find it odd that in a society such as ours, which is so fascinated by where movie stars have lunch or play tennis with, wants to see the objects of their obsession fall flat on their botoxed faces. I am not offering explanations or answers, only making an observation. What's wrong with us?
This may be why most of the people I am interested in were gone long before I arrived. Their warts are already visible. There are no surprises, except by those wishing to rewrite history. There are occasional discoveries, but in these instances, the new information only adds to the story.
By the way, can anyone tell me what a Snookie is?
God bless you. Make it a great day.
- Adolfo
I do, however, make contact with the news. For example, there is no way to not know what's happening in Egypt right now. Give them democracy, I say. Don't worry if it's new to them, they'll figure out what to do with it. We all deserve a chance to be free.
I also found, and read, an article about the most disliked figures in Sports. Al Davis, owner of the Oakland Raiders, tops the list. Michael Vick is up there next to him and Tiger Woods is number four. My question is: who cares?
Tiger Woods is disliked because he is losing. Sure, he cheated on his wife. So did Kobe Bryant. The difference is, Kobe has added some jewelry to his collection, so all is forgiven. Tiger hasn't been so lucky, or focused, or whatever. He'll be back, and he'll be off the list.
Donald Trump once wrote that while people love a hero, they love a fallen hero even more. He may have been right. Why do we love to see successful people stumble? Is it envy? Do we see a little of our own failures in their story? Do we need to be reminded that the glitterati are human?
I find it odd that in a society such as ours, which is so fascinated by where movie stars have lunch or play tennis with, wants to see the objects of their obsession fall flat on their botoxed faces. I am not offering explanations or answers, only making an observation. What's wrong with us?
This may be why most of the people I am interested in were gone long before I arrived. Their warts are already visible. There are no surprises, except by those wishing to rewrite history. There are occasional discoveries, but in these instances, the new information only adds to the story.
By the way, can anyone tell me what a Snookie is?
God bless you. Make it a great day.
- Adolfo
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