A Look Back at The Year

A Year Without News ended last month. Unfortunately, I wasn't able to write up until the last day. Not that I was not inspired, I was just too busy; too caught up in the day-to-day. But with the perspective allowed by time and distance, I can tell you the experiment was a success. I did, for the most part, what I set out to do. I am better. I changed. I do watch news now, but not obsessively. I want to know what's happening in the world, but I can survive without a propaganda IV plugged into my veins. That's progress any way you look at it.

What I got from the year:

- I am more positive. I have learned to look at the glass half-full.
- I am a more well-rounded person. AYWN freed up a lot of time, which I have spent on better things.
- I am more spiritual. More time in front of the bible and less time in front of the newspaper is good for you. I promise. Try it.
- I am clearer. My head is not so muddled with the media garbage I used to fill it with.

Now that I do take in some news, I realize nothing has changed. The left-wing slant is as bad as ever. People still can't admit that President Obama is doing an awful job, and the best thing the news losers can do is try to find something damning in Sarah Palin's emails. Why didn't Obama get this kind of scrutiny? Why isn't he getting it now?

We know about Anthony's Wiener. We know about Kate Middleton and Prince Whatever. There were tornadoes in the South. People are still homeless there, by the way. No criticism of the president for not flying home immediately to "survey the damage." I guess it was more important for him to barbecue with the elites of Europe. Don't get me wrong, I think a president - any president - surveying the aftermath of a natural disaster, is a disaster in itself. What good can they do? None. They can only cause problems by being there. You ever get caught in the traffic caused by a presidential motorcade? Imagine trying to bring needed supplies to people affected by a natural disaster while the prez is rolling past? Ridiculous. Keep on grilling, Barry. You're less likely to do damage that way - you can only burn yourself with a grill.

You see from the rant above why I should probably continue to stay away from the news. The bias, the BS, the nonsense. Our country is in trouble. Our debt is life-threatening. Our economy is wrecked. Our future is in peril. Should we really care about a man who looks like a penis showing a porn-star a picture of his penis? I guess we should, but maybe it's time we focused on what matters.

I got better in that year. Maybe that's why everything seems worse.

- Adolfo

Day # 265 - The Seventh Day

I know I'm not the only one, but I have the flu. I've had it in one form or another for about a week now. It started with the itchy throat and peaked at a fever of 102 a couple of nights ago. Because I am bionic (read: a stupid man)I have not taken any time off from work and haven't really taken any medicine other than a mega-dose of vitamins and Tylenol for the pain in my bones.

Why? Because I am a dingbat, obviously. Even God took a day of rest after creating the heavens and the earth, so what makes me think I can get by without rest? The good thing is I did sleep fairly well last night, so it helps.

When we talk about work-life balance, we tend to think of it in terms of working and then spending time with loved ones. This is by far the most important aspect of it, but we also need to take time for ourselves. It's important to just rest, to sleep, read a book, watch an old movie. In short, we must disconnect from the reality of the world or the reality of the world will overwhelm us. I believe I got this flu mostly because of the stress I've been under. No one can blame me. However, when we don't keep the stress in check, we could easily trade in the flu for something infinitely more serious. Worth it? Oh, no. Not at all.

So when you plan out your day, your week, or your month, set aside quality time with your family, and a little for yourself. Get your rest, drink water, eat veggies... you know the drill.

Remember:

- Get your rest.
- Laugh.
- Be with the people you love and tell them you love them.
- If you didn't go back to work Monday, for whatever reason, your inbox will still be full.

Make it your best day yet. The only way to make it so is with friends and family. God bless you and yours.

- Adolfo

Day 264 - Renewal

It's been a rough ride for my family the last month. It's safe to say January - February 2011 will be remembered, and not fondly.

But there is a limit to everything, and as my sister put it: God never gives you everything at once. This applies not only to the bad, but to the good as well. We simply couldn't handle it and He never gives us more than we can handle.

Death is a part of life, it's the one guarantee besides taxes. We will all face it at one time or another, even if only our own. Those of us who are blessed with lots of friends and relatives will have to face it even more. The pain is proportionate to the joy.

But a moment comes where you have to resolve to move forward. It's not easy. There is so much emotion involved, but you do a disservice to the departed when you allow the pain and sadness to linger. They can't see you or influence you, but if they could, they would tell you it's time to move on.

This is something that applies not only to losing loved ones, but to all the hurts, big and small, that we experience in our lifetimes. You will be hurt. You will be disappointed, betrayed. It comes with the territory when you interact with other human beings. You can't control that. What you can control is how you react to these slights. Grieve, or scream, or yell, if you must, then move on.

I allowed the pain of losing people I love affect me very much. Enough that I have a cold (or flu) and am having even more trouble sleeping than usual. I resolve to end this foolishness. Not that it's foolish to mourn, but it's foolish to allow yourself to be consumed.

I don't want to promise you or myself that I will write every day like I used to, but I will try, knowing that I eventually will.

God bless you. Make it your best day yet.

- Adolfo

Days 253 & 254 - Pop Culture

I set out to avoid news for a year. It was easy to do. I just didn't watch, read, or listen to any news. It isn't a true addiction like alcohol or drugs, so there are no withdrawal symptoms, no urge to break into your house to steal enough money for a hot copy of USA Today (not real news but you get the point.)

I do, however, make contact with the news. For example, there is no way to not know what's happening in Egypt right now. Give them democracy, I say. Don't worry if it's new to them, they'll figure out what to do with it. We all deserve a chance to be free.

I also found, and read, an article about the most disliked figures in Sports. Al Davis, owner of the Oakland Raiders, tops the list. Michael Vick is up there next to him and Tiger Woods is number four. My question is: who cares?

Tiger Woods is disliked because he is losing. Sure, he cheated on his wife. So did Kobe Bryant. The difference is, Kobe has added some jewelry to his collection, so all is forgiven. Tiger hasn't been so lucky, or focused, or whatever. He'll be back, and he'll be off the list.

Donald Trump once wrote that while people love a hero, they love a fallen hero even more. He may have been right. Why do we love to see successful people stumble? Is it envy? Do we see a little of our own failures in their story? Do we need to be reminded that the glitterati are human?

I find it odd that in a society such as ours, which is so fascinated by where movie stars have lunch or play tennis with, wants to see the objects of their obsession fall flat on their botoxed faces. I am not offering explanations or answers, only making an observation. What's wrong with us?

This may be why most of the people I am interested in were gone long before I arrived. Their warts are already visible. There are no surprises, except by those wishing to rewrite history. There are occasional discoveries, but in these instances, the new information only adds to the story.

By the way, can anyone tell me what a Snookie is?

God bless you. Make it a great day.

- Adolfo

Days 236 - 247 - Fortitudine Vincimus

Fortitudine Vincimus: By Endurance We Conquer.

My schedule and unforeseen circumstances have kept me from my commitment to this blog and I am sorry about it. I had a great run... and then I stopped. My family suffered a tragedy, but I dishonored the memory of the departed by not continuing to write. It's what they would have wanted.

The title of this post comes from Sir Ernest Shackleton, the British explorer who came to within 96 miles of being the first man to reach the South Pole. When the pole was reached by Norwegian explorer Roald Amundsen, Shackleton decided he would make a trek across Antarctica. He named the ship which took him there "Endurance." The Shackleton family motto is Fortitudine Vincimus. The Shackleton party was stranded on the ice for two years before Shackleton and a skeleton crew made an 800 mile, open-boat journey to get help. Shackleton brought his men home alive. They endured, and they conquered.

While most of us will never be stranded in Antarctica, it is easy to feel as if we have no shot, as if the odds are insurmountable, we can think of people like Shackleton, who faced incredible odds and prevailed. Nothing is impossible unless we designate it as such.

Sure, there is sadness and pain in the world. We will all face our share of challenges. These things do not define us. Rather, we are defined by how these challenges affect us, and how we meet and overcome them.

Make it a great day. I'll be back in a couple of days.

God bless you and thanks for the prayers and well wishes.

- Adolfo

Days 231 - 235 - Still Kickin'

I would have preferred to have written every day. After all, this is what I had committed to, but with recent events and an overwhelming workload and travel, it's become increasingly difficult to find the time and energy to create new content on a daily basis. I think anyone would agree that I had a great run, writing for over 200 consecutive days including holidays.

I intend to finish the 365 days, but I won't be writing every day anymore (as you can tell.) I will hopefully find useful or interesting tidbits to share with you from time to time and I will bring them to you right here.

The truth is my priorities are shifting. With the recent tragedy my family suffered, I find myself more cognizant of what really matters. As much as I love writing this blog, it's not my number one priority. My priorities are God and family. Everything else is a distant third. I hope that I will soon be able to re-balance my life and write every day, but if not, it matters to me that you, dear reader, understand that I am not ignoring my commitment, I am simply realigning things.

God bless you. Make it your best day yet.

- Adolfo

Day # 230 - Keep Moving Forward

I'm in a funk, as we all can be from time to time. I don't want to write, but here I am. It's been a long time, but I'm pretty sure I've written on this subject before. Why am I doing it? Because I committed to. Because this is something want and need to do.

It's easy to keep moving forward when the path is clear and the wind is at your back, but it's when you're in the dark and can't see your hand in front of your face that you must never give up. Rest during the easy times because you won't get a chance to during the rough times.

I find that the very nature I thought I had escaped, the dark, brooding, pessimistic side of my personality, tries to take over at the first sign of trouble. When I'm tired, it's easy to give in to it. It's like cheating on a diet: you know you shouldn't but it's easy and comforting. Odd that I should describe negativity as comforting, but what else could it be? Why else would our inclination be toward the self-destructive if it wasn't offering us some benefit?

Obstacles are what we see when we take our eyes off the goal. It's important you remember where you need to go, not where you are or what's hindering you or what's in your way.

Don't be afraid to reprimand yourself when you're off course, just as you should reward yourself for even the small victories. You're never too old for a little positive reinforcement.

It also helps to pray. It helps a lot. Don't be shy about asking friends and family to pray for you, and never forget to pray for them.

God bless you. Make it a great day and keep your eyes on the prize.

- Adolfo

Day # 222 - Not Yet

A friend of mine left me a message a couple of days congratulating me on surviving A Year Without News and asking what was next. I have 143 days to go yet, but I'm still chugging along. I sometimes wish it had been 2010 without news, but... a year is a year.

Of course, the question of what will come next is one I keep hearing, from others and from myself. What will I do when this year is up, what will this experience mean? Will I look back with fondness or will I wonder what on earth I was doing, or some combination of both?

I guess the beauty is that I really don't know what will happen when the year is up. I don't even know what I will write about tomorrow. I think this will serve as a journal, providing insight into what I was like as I approached 40. I think my children might enjoy reading it one day. I hope they will.

So, as for what's next, I guess we'll see tomorrow. Whatever else, it's been fun. I know some of the posts have been better than others, and I'm okay with that. Writing nonfiction every day is hard work. But this is a lot like going to the gym. This is about the simple discipline of getting up and doing what has to be done. Really, what else is there?

143 days to go. Seems daunting. This isn't a leap year is it?

God bless you. Make it your best day yet.

- Adolfo

Day # 221 - Teeth, Men, Women

Emily is about to lose her first tooth. It's one of the front bottom ones. She's so cute, I can't stand it. I spent most of the day with the girls yesterday but the tooth didn't become a problem until mommy came home. Coincidence? I doubt it.

The irony is that I am the "leave it alone" parent. I don't mess with the tooth, I let nature run its course. Abby, on the other hand, brings out the explosives, hammer, and chisel and goes after the tooth. (Slight exaggeration.) You would expect the child to talk to me about the tooth and then button up when mom gets home. It doesn't always work that way. Mom is still Mom.

In this society, where so many would like to blur the roles of mothers and fathers, or men and women, it's amazing how nature always finds a way. Dad carries the groceries in from the car, cuts the lawn, and chases lizards out of the house; Mom takes care of the babies when they don't feel well. This isn't sexism, it's reality. They come to me when they're scared, they go to mom when they don't feel well.

Emily is only five. Is it early to be losing a tooth? The same happened with Melissa so I guess not. See, these are things dads don't know. All I know is I can't stand to see my little girls unhappy, so I will let that tooth hang on in there until it says, "Enough, I quit!" and walks out on it's own. Anything to not make her cry. Man, I'm a softie.

We all have a role to play; at home, at work, in society. There is no reason to blur the lines or consider it a bad thing to be what God intended you to be. A mother is a mother, and a father is a father. As Time Magazine figured out (the morons actually put it on the cover): There is a difference between men and women. Let's embrace it.

God bless you. Make it a great day.

- Adolfo

Day # 220 - The Wisdom of Children

Yesterday, we had to give our children some bad news. Never an easy thing to do. I won't go into what the news was because it is of a personal nature and it's irrelevant to the point I'm trying to make.

My daughters have rarely seen me cry. I am a bit of a cry baby, but I've managed to keep that side of me from them for a long time. Yesterday, as I spoke with them, I cracked. They saw me lose it. They were upset of course, but Melissa did something that amazed me: she walked away and came back with a little card I have on my desk that reads: Count your blessings not your worries. Of course, me being the tough guy that I am, this made me really start bawling.

The amazing thing is that children will go where you lead them. For the longest time, I have tried to teach my children certain values and attitudes. Positivity is something I want them to have. Given how negative I was most of my life, I find it important to teach them this while they are young, to make these beliefs a part of their nature. If it's my job to mold them into the women they will be one day, then I need to focus on nurturing the good, not whatever their nature may be.

I believe many of us are predisposed to certain attitudes, but I also believe that these attitudes can be replaced with different attitudes. Just as the happiest person can become jaded and angry with the pressures and worries of every day life, the darkest attitude can be lightened with practice.

Yesterday, Melissa made me proud. It's not the first time and it won't be the last. She is an amazing person. The credit for this goes to God, not to her earthly parents. I'm just glad I haven't screwed that up.

Teach your kids the right thing in every circumstance. Talk to them like your equals, not like inferiors. Show them to have confidence, and you never know when they will reward you.

God bless you. Make it a great day.

- Adolfo

Day # 219 - Changing

Too much happening at once can get the best of anyone. We can't all have the patience of Gandhi, or Mother Teresa, or whomever else happens to be patient. It's always been a weak spot for me. I have always been impatient and temperamental. My temper has often been violent. It used to be one of those blinding emotions. I would lose it to the point that I didn't know what I was doing. With time, I would still lose it, but I started hearing a voice trying to calm me. With more time, I've learned not to ignore the voice. I still get angry, of course, but it's under control.

In this time of resolutions, we hear about weight loss and quitting smoking. If this little project of mine has taught me anything, it's that we need to not look at symptoms but at the source of the problem. I found that much of the negativity I was feeling was a result of my obsession with things that made me unhappy, or aggravated. By eliminating news, then caffeine, then limiting the amount of junk I eat, I have slowly improved myself. I am not at my goal yet, but I am getting there. I am approaching a better me slowly and steadily, which means my gains will be sustainable.

If you want to lose weight, don't think in terms of pounds, think in terms of lifestyle. Do you sit on the couch with a bag of Fritos? Do you drink a lot of soda? Are you getting enough water?

Is money your issue? Do a budget. Yes, it's tedious, but it beats the snot out of being broke all the time.

Are you a negative person? Decide that you will be positive from now on. It is absolutely that simple. Decide that you will be happy and declare it out loud. Don't listen to negative words or music; read uplifting books. Accept and embrace the fact that life will give you lemons, then open up a lemonade stand and share the happiness.

The second day of the year is as good a time as any. Don't make resolutions, make the decision, the determination, and get to work. If you think self-improvement is hard, I can assure you it's easier than the status quo. It's just a matter of forming new habits - One at a time.

Let me know how it goes.

God bless you. Make it a great day. And remember the mantra: Day by day, in every way, I am getting better and better.

- Adolfo

Day # 218 - Peer Pressure

I bought the girls a bottle of sparkling white grape juice. It's made by Welch's and looks like wine both in the bottle and when you pour it. The girls have seen Abby and I drink wine and always ask about it. I poured the glasses without them knowing what it was and when they commented, I put the glasses in front of them and told them they could have their first sip of wine.

At first they didn't believe it, then they were nervously excited, then just plain scared. Melissa was sure the police would come and arrest her parents if she took a sip of the forbidden beverage. I kept telling her it's okay because she has her parents' permission, but she kept telling me it's wrong. Finally, she broke down crying because her parents were trying to get her to do something bad. This was not my intention. I thought they would jump at the opportunity to drink some hooch. My children chose to do the right thing even when the people they trust most tried to convince them to do otherwise.

I feel a certain comfort at this. I believe my kids will be well-prepared for the world out there. I have never told them that if they drink alcohol they'll go blind or die or any other nonsense. I have told them that they need to be 21, and that drinking as a child can harm their still-developing brains. Simple. No need to talk to them like they're idiots. Talking to kids like people is a great way to show them you respect them and how to respect themselves.

We won't always be there to help them make decisions, but preparing them to make the right decisions is the next best thing.

God bless you. Happy New Year.

-Adolfo

Day # 216 - Life In The Way

2010 is about to end and what can we say about it? I can't say much about the year that was except for my own year because I've sort of insulated myself from the world. It's been a good year for me. I'm happier than I was when it started. The last 216 days have changed me. I'm glad I took this project on.

Of course, there is still the longing for more. In my case, I find myself wanting more time. I find myself learning to appreciate the things that truly matter and wishing I could go back in time and enjoy the things I was missing when I was trying to be a man, or when I was angry at things beyond my control. I want to go back to the times when I let life get in the way of my life and change that. But I can't. All I can do is make sure that from here on out, I find that balance. Regrets will never amount to anything. Nothing was ever accomplished by looking at the past, or the future for that matter, and wishing.

Right now, life is keeping me from sleeping, so I respond by living, not by lying in bed, cursing the darkness. I write, I read, I learn. The sun will be up soon and the day will begin; another chance to get it right.

Days # 214 & 215 - The Missing

I was in Key West again so I couldn't write. I guess I could have written last night when I got back, but I found it preferable to fall asleep on the couch watching Despicable Me with the girls. What is it about being alone away from home that makes you miss everything? Absence indeed makes the heart grow fonder.

I wonder how people do it. I think of long-distance truckers who are away from their families for long periods. I think of my close friend who moved to Georgia, temporarily leaving his family behind. How long his nights must have been. I think of the troops gone for months or years or forever, and I wonder how people do it. I was gone for one night and couldn't keep my eyes from welling up.

Maybe it's because we're still in the holidays and one of my sons is in Fort Myers and the other is in Philadelphia, while my daughters were home. I just want them all with me, but I know it can't be. I know fathers have to go out and do their work wherever that may lead them.

Time and distance, huh?

God bless you, make it your great day. Hug your babies.

- Adolfo

Day # 213 - That Organization Thing

Christmas has passed and now it's time to get to work. I am back on my mission to organization. I've learned you start with your mind, not your desk. If your thoughts are disorganized (as mine have always been) you have no chance at organizing your world.

Lesson # 1: Amateurs remember, pros write it down.

Carry a notebook. I have always done this and I can tell you it could work, except that the notebooks I carry reflect what's happening upstairs: messy, disorganized, etc... It does no good to write down important information if you can't easily find it when you need it. I am learning this.

Lesson # 2: Listen Actively: In other words, ask questions.

When you are being given instructions, it's easy to zone out. If you make yourself ask questions, even simple, or stupid, questions, you're more likely to stay involved. I am learning this.

Lesson # 3: Create a system and stick to it.

Do whatever works for you. It may be a notepad, a PDA, or a spreadsheet. Whatever you do, just do it. As an old co-worker of mine used to say: a place for everything, and everything in its place. I am working on this one.

Lesson # 4: Have an accountability partner.

I work on my own and my office is in my house. I have enlisted Abby to help me stay organized. She warned me that she would be on my back constantly. I accepted because that is the only way this arrangement could possibly work.

Think of how much time you lose looking for papers, notes, whatever. Have you ever lost a deal because you lost a memo and didn't get back to someone on time. I have. I've made these mistakes and I am determined to never let them happen again. This is why I am creating the system.

I hope you had a Merry Christmas. God bless you. Make it a great day.

- Adolfo

Day # 212 - Merry Christmas

It's 4:30 in the morning. I go out to the living room and turn on the Christmas tree lights, giving the girls the illusion that they've been on all night. I lay in bed and try to sleep but I'm excited. I can't wait. I never really got to enjoy this with my sons.

Around six, I hear them in their room over the monitor. They're trying to figure out whether it's to early to get out of bed. It's an awesome conversation to hear. They come out to the living room and see the gifts under the tree. They're trying to contain their excitement but I no longer need the monitor to hear them. I hear them coming to my room, Abby is awake by now, but we pretend to be asleep. They look at us from the door, two silhouettes. They decide to let us sleep. I'm losing my mind by now, wanting to go out there and watch them open their gifts. Abby tells me to sit tight. She's the patient one in this dynamic.

The girls get loud all of a sudden and, with Abby's permission of course, I call out, "Who's out there?"
"The kids."
"Oh, okay. What are you doing?"
"We got presents!"
"Really?"
"Yes!"
And they come over with our present: a 2011 calendar Melissa made for us in class. Melissa patiently, and proudly, watches us go through each of the twelve months, explaining what each drawing is.

Now, it's time for presents. Instinctively, they take turns opening their presents, allowing me to shift the focus of the video camera from one child to the other. They're happy and we're happy because of it.

They won't believe in Santa forever and I'm fine with that. They have to grow up and they don't need permission to do so. But I see nothing wrong in maintaining their innocence for as long as possible. Magic is real if you believe in it and want my children's lives to have as much magic as possible. I owe them that.

It's also important, in my house, for them to be mindful of the reason for Christmas. There is no "X" in Christmas and we plan to keep it that way. Christmas is a great opportunity for teaching your children. Teach them that there are other people in the world and that the spirit of this holiday is not about receiving, it's about giving. That is the greatest gift I can give my children, that while we celebrate the birth of Christ by sharing gifts, we honor His life and sacrifice by sharing our blessings.

Merry Christmas. May the blessings of God be upon you and your family. Make it a great day.

- Adolfo

Day # 211 - Noche Buena

I've always loved Christmas Eve. Mostly because Cubans, like many Hispanics, are too impatient to wait until Christmas to open their gifts, so we wait until midnight (or earlier) to open them. It gives away the Santa Secret maybe, but who cares? I want presents!

I have tried to build my own traditions with my family and for the most part, they've worked fine, but there are some which I love. Noche Buena is one of them. The family will gather, eat, and chat, and watch Christmas movies. Same thing the Gringos do, but sooner. Christmas becomes Boxing Day, when we go visit relatives so the kids can pick up what Santa left in other houses for them. It's when we pass out the socks and the perfume and the books. Speaking of which, last year I got my mom a book and a pair of soft slippers. She asked if I was planning to send her to a home. That crafty old woman was on to me from the start!

The important thing is the fun of being with your family and loving them as best you can. A hug and kiss mean more than the ribbons and bows and what's beneath them. In the end, when fate separates us from the ones we love, it's the hugs and kisses and voices that we'll miss, not the stuff.

Love someone today. And every day. Let every day be a good day and every night be a Noche Buena. Don't be reserved in your emotion; love with reckless abandon. Call a relative who's far away; a sister or brother, an old roommate, someone who may be alone. Wish them a Merry Christmas. Let them know someone is thinking about them. You never know what a difference you can make in a person's life.

God bless you. Make it a great day.

- Adolfo

Day #210 - Man vs. Bridge Round 1

I'm back on the mainland and it's fantastic! Good to be home. Not that I won't be going back. I will and soon, I'm sure, but I am closer to putting the bridge nonsense behind me.

I learned that it's good to chew gum when your nervous because it will keep you from grinding your teeth. I also learned that nothing is scary. How's that for some insight?

What I mean when I tell you nothing is scary is that we assign fear to things. We are scared of certain things and that has nothing to do with the thing we fear. (The thought is clear, but I am having a hard time articulating it.) Why is one person afraid of heights and another isn't? A mountain isn't scary, but someone may be scared of a mountain while another person can't wait to climb to the top of it. The difference is in the thought process, the belief, of one person compared to the other.

I'm tired. I didn't sleep well last night. I never sleep very well in hotels, even in very nice ones. If what I've written makes no sense, it's not you, it's me. Good night.

- Adolfo

Day # 209 - Bridges

For the longest time, I've had a problem with bridges. I don't know the origin of it, but it's pretty bad. It's also irrational. I know it is. I know it makes no sense to go into a panic over crossing a bridge. Yet, although I know it makes no sense to be nervous, I become a wreck.

Fears are like bullies, the only way to defeat them is head-on. Part of the territory I cover for my job is Key West (ain't it hell?) and if you've never been to Key West it's basically a bunch of tiny islands connected by bridges. We don't need no stinkin' ferry boats!

So today, I'll be heading to Key West...alone. I have been mentally preparing myself for this the last few days and I am confident that everything will be fine. I'll probably drive a little slower over the Seven Mile Bridge than most people, but I don't mind being honked at. I can live with other people's disapproval. They can go around me after the hump.

It's a funny thing about fear: even when you know there is nothing to fear, you feel it anyway. I know that millions of people cross these bridges every year. I know I will be in no more danger than in any other place I drive (less danger since I drive in Miami all the time) and yet my palms are sweating even as I write this. I know this is a process. I know I can't just decide not to be scared and it will be so. I also know that if it is to be, it is up to me.

I'll write tomorrow from the Keys before heading back. I think I'll have dinner at Sloppy Joe's tonight and breakfast at the French Bakery before returning tomorrow. Maybe not, I'll cross that bridge when I get to it. (Sorry, couldn't resist.)

God bless you. Make it a great day.

- Adolfo

Day # 208 - A New Challenge

208 days of this and the complaint is still the same: I don't know what to write about. This may be the hardest thing I've ever committed to. And the next project just dawned on me: I am going to get organized. This is something I have half-heartedly worked on for a while, but now, I'm going to get serious about it.

I am a capable person. I believe I have a fair amount of talent, though I am not sure how to define my talent. I am a quick learner, a curious person. I could be great... if I could just remember where I left that piece of paper.

There is no doubt in my mind that I have lost deals or sales or money in my life time due to my lack of organization. Somehow that was never reason enough for me to straighten myself out. It should be reason enough, but even at this point it doesn't really motivate me. I want to organize myself because I know I should. Because it will make my life easier. Because it will make me more productive. Because my cluttered desk is making me bonkers!

So now the quest for neatness begins. I have already moved in this direction, but now I am being more serious and deliberate about it.

I'll let you know how it goes. Tomorrow and the day after, we'll talk about bridges.

God bless you. Make it your best, most organized day yet.

- Adolfo