The opportunity I wrote about a week or so ago is still in process. Time is of the essence. Literally. This deal has to get done in about six days or it will end up costing us an additional 100k at a minimum. I met with an major player in the deal yesterday. He is a very shrewd young man. In all honesty, I went in there expecting something totally different than what I got. I decided to lay all my cards face up on the table and it seems to me he did the same.
It proved that even though sometimes in a negotiation you have to hold back some information, you must be honest and make an effort to be friends with the person on the other side of the table. The world is small enough that you can end up across the table from him again some day. If you can make a deal, fine. If you can't, then it's always best to part friends.
Now I have to go back to the party I am representing and give them what I think is good news, but what they may consider bad news. I can't go into too much detail, but essentially what I need to do is sell them a $10 bill for a buck. Sounds easy, but they want it for a dime. I am working for experience here so I don't stand to make a dime if the deal falls through. I make approximately a dime if I am successful.
There are many opportunities in this situation and the biggest for me is the experience I am gaining. I hope I will get this wrapped up soon so I can reveal what it's all about. Until then, keep guessing.
Lessons:
- It's always better to negotiate as friends.
- Honesty is still the best policy.
- You won't gain unless you are willing to give.
I have a fun day planned today. I hope you do, too. God bless you and make it your best day yet.
- Adolfo
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Saturday, August 21, 2010
Friday, August 20, 2010
Day # 85 - Good night
Today will be my daughters' third day of school. In an hour we will will be hustling and bustling and getting breakfast and brushing a lot of hair and finding socks. Why is it always so hard to find socks? I mean, we buy them by the half-dozen and three days later... not a sock to be found within a thousand miles.
I always sit with them for a few minutes at bedtime to remind them to say their prayers and to think happy thoughts and dream big dreams for the following day. I didn't always do this. This is a recently learned behavior. I talk to them about things going on in my life and ask them to pray for me and for their mommy. They pray for their brothers and for the kids in Haiti. They pray for their classmates, even the ones they don't get along with, they pray for our country and our soldiers.
Whether you believe in God or not, the power of prayer is undeniable. There is no doubt left that positive thoughts, sent forth into the universe, will have a positive effect. It's been proven in medical studies, where groups of people have prayed for patients on the other side of the world without the knowledge of the patient. The person being prayed for had a faster rate of healing than the person not being prayed for. It's amusing that in such an illogical world, we dismiss this because it's not scientifically provable. That doesn't stop the global warming crowd.
Positive self-talk is an important ingredient in personal development and success. In fact, if you don't think well of yourself, you can never do your best. Prayer is the ultimate self-talk. When you pray, you are talking to your source, to the Creator of the universe. When you get Him on your side, you've got a top-notch corner man.
Each night, and throughout the day, I remind my children that they are great, that there are no limits on what they can accomplish. Last night, Melissa told me school is hard. I told her:
"School is not hard. A billion kids have done it. Imagine being the first person to jump out of an airplane. Imagine being the first person to fly in an airplane. Imagine being the President. Those things are hard, and you're smarter than any of the people who have done those things. You have more smarts in your little toe, than Einstein had in his whole brain."
If I had agreed with her, and told her that she was right, that school is hard, I would have given her an out. I would have failed as a father and as the leader of my family. This is why words must be chosen carefully and there is no such thing as exaggeration when it comes to praising your kids.
Today's Lesson:
- It's easier to praise than to criticize. Both are powerful. When you criticize your child, you are tying their hands and capping their potential. This is not to say you shouldn't scold or punish, but let the first and last words they hear every day be overwhelmingly positive.
Today's Declarations:
- Day by day in every way I am getting better and better.
- I will build up my children and the people around me. I will never use my words to destroy.
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I always sit with them for a few minutes at bedtime to remind them to say their prayers and to think happy thoughts and dream big dreams for the following day. I didn't always do this. This is a recently learned behavior. I talk to them about things going on in my life and ask them to pray for me and for their mommy. They pray for their brothers and for the kids in Haiti. They pray for their classmates, even the ones they don't get along with, they pray for our country and our soldiers.
Whether you believe in God or not, the power of prayer is undeniable. There is no doubt left that positive thoughts, sent forth into the universe, will have a positive effect. It's been proven in medical studies, where groups of people have prayed for patients on the other side of the world without the knowledge of the patient. The person being prayed for had a faster rate of healing than the person not being prayed for. It's amusing that in such an illogical world, we dismiss this because it's not scientifically provable. That doesn't stop the global warming crowd.
Positive self-talk is an important ingredient in personal development and success. In fact, if you don't think well of yourself, you can never do your best. Prayer is the ultimate self-talk. When you pray, you are talking to your source, to the Creator of the universe. When you get Him on your side, you've got a top-notch corner man.
Each night, and throughout the day, I remind my children that they are great, that there are no limits on what they can accomplish. Last night, Melissa told me school is hard. I told her:
"School is not hard. A billion kids have done it. Imagine being the first person to jump out of an airplane. Imagine being the first person to fly in an airplane. Imagine being the President. Those things are hard, and you're smarter than any of the people who have done those things. You have more smarts in your little toe, than Einstein had in his whole brain."
If I had agreed with her, and told her that she was right, that school is hard, I would have given her an out. I would have failed as a father and as the leader of my family. This is why words must be chosen carefully and there is no such thing as exaggeration when it comes to praising your kids.
Today's Lesson:
- It's easier to praise than to criticize. Both are powerful. When you criticize your child, you are tying their hands and capping their potential. This is not to say you shouldn't scold or punish, but let the first and last words they hear every day be overwhelmingly positive.
Today's Declarations:
- Day by day in every way I am getting better and better.
- I will build up my children and the people around me. I will never use my words to destroy.
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Thursday, August 19, 2010
Day # 84 - Don't jinx it
Careful what you wish for, it may come true. We've all heard the expression and we've all used it. How often have you said it to yourself? It's not always a matter of wishing for something. Sometimes we constantly wish something away, but our obsession with the object attracts it to us. Am I not making sense? I'm a little punchy so please forgive me.
84 days of writing every day has been a challenge. Especially since I still have 281 days to go. When people talk to me about the blog, too often I have mentioned that the biggest challenge is knowing what I'm going to write about next. Yesterday I said it a couple of times and here I am. It's not even two in the morning and I'm up. Why? I think I might have been worried about fulfilling my own prophecy. So I can tell you that from here on out, I will not talk about how hard it is, I will talk about how much fun it is.
Nothing is impossible. You really can achieve anything you put your mind to. I set out to write about how avoiding news would change my life. I did it not knowing what to expect. All I knew at the beginning was that I wanted to be better at the end than I was at the beginning. I think I have already accomplished that goal and I'm less than a quarter of the way done. The exciting part is when I think of how much better I will be when I have completed my year.
Today's Lessons:
- Don't wish it were easier, wish you were better. - Jim Rohn
- You can't unscramble eggs. Eliminate negative talk from your vocabulary because once you put it out there, you can't get it back.
Today's Declarations:
- Day by day in every way I am getting better and better.
- I will speak blessings over myself, my family, my friends, and even my enemies.
- I am a positive person. I look forward to each new day with excitement.
- I am optimistic, knowing that every day brings new opportunities.
Don't jinx yourself. Don't jinx the people around you. Wish and speak the best for yourself and everyone you come in contact with. Be a blessing in the lives you touch. Believe in your heart that you can do anything you decide to do and declare it with your mouth.
God bless you. Make it your best day yet.
- Adolfo
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84 days of writing every day has been a challenge. Especially since I still have 281 days to go. When people talk to me about the blog, too often I have mentioned that the biggest challenge is knowing what I'm going to write about next. Yesterday I said it a couple of times and here I am. It's not even two in the morning and I'm up. Why? I think I might have been worried about fulfilling my own prophecy. So I can tell you that from here on out, I will not talk about how hard it is, I will talk about how much fun it is.
Nothing is impossible. You really can achieve anything you put your mind to. I set out to write about how avoiding news would change my life. I did it not knowing what to expect. All I knew at the beginning was that I wanted to be better at the end than I was at the beginning. I think I have already accomplished that goal and I'm less than a quarter of the way done. The exciting part is when I think of how much better I will be when I have completed my year.
Today's Lessons:
- Don't wish it were easier, wish you were better. - Jim Rohn
- You can't unscramble eggs. Eliminate negative talk from your vocabulary because once you put it out there, you can't get it back.
Today's Declarations:
- Day by day in every way I am getting better and better.
- I will speak blessings over myself, my family, my friends, and even my enemies.
- I am a positive person. I look forward to each new day with excitement.
- I am optimistic, knowing that every day brings new opportunities.
Don't jinx yourself. Don't jinx the people around you. Wish and speak the best for yourself and everyone you come in contact with. Be a blessing in the lives you touch. Believe in your heart that you can do anything you decide to do and declare it with your mouth.
God bless you. Make it your best day yet.
- Adolfo
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Wednesday, August 18, 2010
Day # 83 - Expectations
Back to school today. Not all schools, but my daughters start today. Half day. Melissa is in 2nd Grade, Emily's in Kindergarten. Melissa was on the Principal's Honor Roll all last year. I expect the same. Emily did above average in 4K last year, but I expect more.
I expect these things, but I don't push them. I expect my children to to their absolute best. If a person is not cut out to be a straight "A" student, so be it. But once you have proven your potential, I will expect you to live up to it constantly.
My parents knew my potential. I used to screw up a lot in spite of my (according to all my teachers) obvious intelligence. I was given my first IQ test in 1st or 2nd grade and my results were such that my Vice Principal was moved to tears. I can still remember her telling me that I was so intelligent, that I was smarter than 90% of the kids out there, that I could be anything I put my mind to...
She may as well have been speaking Chinese. My parents didn't know how to motivate me and besides, they were too busy trying to keep me out of handcuffs. So, I allowed my intelligence to atrophy while I skipped school, got in trouble, and generally stopped caring. By 17 I was a dropout.
No one told me what they were expecting, only what they wanted. No one told me what to expect. Please don't misunderstand me, my parents were (are) phenomenal and I know how blessed I was to have them. The fact that my police record is clean is a testament to my parents and the whippings I was handed. My sister toughed it out and got her degree. She met her own expectations where I didn't have any.
So my kids are being given clear expectations. They are expected to do their best, to be the best they can be, and to never give up. They know that failure only happens when you stop trying, and that the words "I can't" will get them ten Jumping Jacks. Over the next school year, as I write this blog, I will always have the lessons of my own wasted youth in mind. It's why I am up at 5:00 AM writing. It's why I go to bed thinking about the next day, and why I spend part of each day thinking about next week and next year and the next five years. I have to set my own expectations, because that's where I'm going.
Today's Lessons:
- People (especially kids) will meet you at your expectations.
- Practice what you preach, but share your mistakes, too. In other words, if you did drugs, telling your kids not to doesn't make you a hypocrite, it gives you a unique opportunity to share your wisdom.
Today's Declarations:
- Day by day in every way I am getting better and better
- I will have high expectations of myself and others, knowing we all rise to meet expectations.
God bless you. Make it your best day yet.
- Adolfo
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I expect these things, but I don't push them. I expect my children to to their absolute best. If a person is not cut out to be a straight "A" student, so be it. But once you have proven your potential, I will expect you to live up to it constantly.
My parents knew my potential. I used to screw up a lot in spite of my (according to all my teachers) obvious intelligence. I was given my first IQ test in 1st or 2nd grade and my results were such that my Vice Principal was moved to tears. I can still remember her telling me that I was so intelligent, that I was smarter than 90% of the kids out there, that I could be anything I put my mind to...
She may as well have been speaking Chinese. My parents didn't know how to motivate me and besides, they were too busy trying to keep me out of handcuffs. So, I allowed my intelligence to atrophy while I skipped school, got in trouble, and generally stopped caring. By 17 I was a dropout.
No one told me what they were expecting, only what they wanted. No one told me what to expect. Please don't misunderstand me, my parents were (are) phenomenal and I know how blessed I was to have them. The fact that my police record is clean is a testament to my parents and the whippings I was handed. My sister toughed it out and got her degree. She met her own expectations where I didn't have any.
So my kids are being given clear expectations. They are expected to do their best, to be the best they can be, and to never give up. They know that failure only happens when you stop trying, and that the words "I can't" will get them ten Jumping Jacks. Over the next school year, as I write this blog, I will always have the lessons of my own wasted youth in mind. It's why I am up at 5:00 AM writing. It's why I go to bed thinking about the next day, and why I spend part of each day thinking about next week and next year and the next five years. I have to set my own expectations, because that's where I'm going.
Today's Lessons:
- People (especially kids) will meet you at your expectations.
- Practice what you preach, but share your mistakes, too. In other words, if you did drugs, telling your kids not to doesn't make you a hypocrite, it gives you a unique opportunity to share your wisdom.
Today's Declarations:
- Day by day in every way I am getting better and better
- I will have high expectations of myself and others, knowing we all rise to meet expectations.
God bless you. Make it your best day yet.
- Adolfo
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Tuesday, August 17, 2010
Day # 82 - What's in a name?
The sweetest sound you will ever hear is the sound of your own name. I guess that means the worst sound is the sound of someone getting your name wrong. When your name is Adolfo, it happens all the time. I'm not sure why. It's not complicated. Six letters, evenly split between vowels and consonants. I thinks it's a pretty nice name, actually.
But man, do people mess it up.
I woke up this morning unsure what I would write about. In fact, I had no idea. Then I checked my crackberry, and saw where someone responded to my generosity with, "Thanks, Alfredo." They dropped an "O" from my name and added "R" and "E" and completely changed the tone of the letter. The message was to thank me for a donation. Maybe I'm being hypersensitive, but the impact of the letter was lessened because the sender didn't take the four seconds required to get my name right. In fact, I don't remember anything else about the message.
Details will make the difference in anything you do. I know this mostly because I have never been a detail person. I know what this has cost me over the years. Perhaps it's because my name is somewhat unusual, but I have always been pretty good about proper pronunciation and spelling of names. As a sales guy, and knowing that it is the sweetest sound to its owner, it has always been a major point for me.
A month or two ago, I got a message on facebook from a website designer who started by screwing up my name: "Adolpho" I think, and then telling me my business website looks like it was designed in 1994. He didn't get the sale not only because of the name thing, but his ham-fisted approach was offensive. I designed the website myself and it has made me a lot of money over the years. He was wrong and insulting.
Whether you are in sales or just want to make more friends, make the effort to get people's name right and improve your communications skills. It's an easy investment in improving your career and your personal life.
Thought for today:
- As always, it's the seemingly little things that make all the difference in the world.
- If names aren't your strong suit. Learn some memory tricks, like repeating a person's name when you meet them and imagining them with someone else of the same name so you associate their name with the more familiar person. Little things. It's always the little things.
Remember: Day by day in every way I am getting better and better.
God bless you. Make it your best day yet.
- Adolfo
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But man, do people mess it up.
I woke up this morning unsure what I would write about. In fact, I had no idea. Then I checked my crackberry, and saw where someone responded to my generosity with, "Thanks, Alfredo." They dropped an "O" from my name and added "R" and "E" and completely changed the tone of the letter. The message was to thank me for a donation. Maybe I'm being hypersensitive, but the impact of the letter was lessened because the sender didn't take the four seconds required to get my name right. In fact, I don't remember anything else about the message.
Details will make the difference in anything you do. I know this mostly because I have never been a detail person. I know what this has cost me over the years. Perhaps it's because my name is somewhat unusual, but I have always been pretty good about proper pronunciation and spelling of names. As a sales guy, and knowing that it is the sweetest sound to its owner, it has always been a major point for me.
A month or two ago, I got a message on facebook from a website designer who started by screwing up my name: "Adolpho" I think, and then telling me my business website looks like it was designed in 1994. He didn't get the sale not only because of the name thing, but his ham-fisted approach was offensive. I designed the website myself and it has made me a lot of money over the years. He was wrong and insulting.
Whether you are in sales or just want to make more friends, make the effort to get people's name right and improve your communications skills. It's an easy investment in improving your career and your personal life.
Thought for today:
- As always, it's the seemingly little things that make all the difference in the world.
- If names aren't your strong suit. Learn some memory tricks, like repeating a person's name when you meet them and imagining them with someone else of the same name so you associate their name with the more familiar person. Little things. It's always the little things.
Remember: Day by day in every way I am getting better and better.
God bless you. Make it your best day yet.
- Adolfo
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Monday, August 16, 2010
Day # 81 - Carpe Diem or Carpe Temporis Punctum
There are moments of frustration that can ruin even a good day. Often these are not big things, they are little thorns and rather than pull them out, we let them irritate us until our pain becomes everyone else's pain.
Saturday night, my son Steven called me. He was stuck on Alligator Alley with his girlfriend and his four-year old daughter. Their car was overheating. He mentioned something about the car having trouble (before leaving on the trip) and I immediately jumped on that. The rest of the world faded away. How could he be so irresponsible? How could he drive the alley with a toddler in an unreliable car?
I told him I would see what I could do. Bottom line is I took a drive out to the alley. AAA told me a tow truck would be $5 per mile, which would have added up to $300+ dollars so I decided to drive it home myself. We made it to Fort Lauderdale before the care heated up.
I left the car overnight and repaired it myself. Problem solved. Total cost: six bucks and a little aggravation.
I told you that to tell you this:
When we stopped out there on the alley, in all that darkness, I did something I hadn't done in a while: I looked up at the stars. There were too many to count, too many to understand, and they were beautiful beyond words and it reminded me of driving with Steven and AJ, going to Lakeland when they were kids, stopping on State Road 60, stopping and laying on the hood of the car to see the millions of stars out there. Amazing. They're always there, but the ambient light makes them impossible to see. Looking at the stars calmed me. I guess it made me realize how small and insignificant a broken-down car really is.
Life is made up of moments, some happy, some sad, some aggravating, some gratifying. I hadn't seen Steven in a while and I would have preferred different circumstances, but it was nice to see him. We drove together along the alley and had a chance to talk about a lot of things. It was nice to reconnect. It was nice to seize the moment and just talk with my son.
Thoughts for today:
- Seize the moment.
- Look up at the stars now and then. While your problems may seem important, reminding yourself that there is a vast universe out there helps you remember how insignificant they really are.
Declarations:
- Day by day in every way I am getting better and better
- I will always remember to let the little things slide.
- I will never waste a chance to talk to someone I love or to look up and count the stars.
Little things matter. If you ignore them, you will soon enough start ignoring big things. Learn to love them all.
Make it your best day yet. God bless you.
-Adolfo
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Saturday night, my son Steven called me. He was stuck on Alligator Alley with his girlfriend and his four-year old daughter. Their car was overheating. He mentioned something about the car having trouble (before leaving on the trip) and I immediately jumped on that. The rest of the world faded away. How could he be so irresponsible? How could he drive the alley with a toddler in an unreliable car?
I told him I would see what I could do. Bottom line is I took a drive out to the alley. AAA told me a tow truck would be $5 per mile, which would have added up to $300+ dollars so I decided to drive it home myself. We made it to Fort Lauderdale before the care heated up.
I left the car overnight and repaired it myself. Problem solved. Total cost: six bucks and a little aggravation.
I told you that to tell you this:
When we stopped out there on the alley, in all that darkness, I did something I hadn't done in a while: I looked up at the stars. There were too many to count, too many to understand, and they were beautiful beyond words and it reminded me of driving with Steven and AJ, going to Lakeland when they were kids, stopping on State Road 60, stopping and laying on the hood of the car to see the millions of stars out there. Amazing. They're always there, but the ambient light makes them impossible to see. Looking at the stars calmed me. I guess it made me realize how small and insignificant a broken-down car really is.
Life is made up of moments, some happy, some sad, some aggravating, some gratifying. I hadn't seen Steven in a while and I would have preferred different circumstances, but it was nice to see him. We drove together along the alley and had a chance to talk about a lot of things. It was nice to reconnect. It was nice to seize the moment and just talk with my son.
Thoughts for today:
- Seize the moment.
- Look up at the stars now and then. While your problems may seem important, reminding yourself that there is a vast universe out there helps you remember how insignificant they really are.
Declarations:
- Day by day in every way I am getting better and better
- I will always remember to let the little things slide.
- I will never waste a chance to talk to someone I love or to look up and count the stars.
Little things matter. If you ignore them, you will soon enough start ignoring big things. Learn to love them all.
Make it your best day yet. God bless you.
-Adolfo
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Sunday, August 15, 2010
Day # 80 - Watch your mouth
We have all said something regrettable in a moment of anger, something we wish we could take back, sometimes before the words have left our lips. Other times we know we're going to regret saying something and we say it any way. You may not be thinking of it at the moment, but at some level you know you should probably shut up or think of something else to say.
It's hard to overstate the importance of words. Words from a president can lead to war or sink global markets. Words of encouragement from a parent or a teacher can give a kid a much needed boost. Words from a spouse can encourage, or wound. Words from a child can overwhelm you, or simply leave you laughing or shaking your head.
Think back to an important moment in your life. You will always remember the words that marked the occasion. If you have had a life-changing moment, it is likely because of something someone said to you. We may not remember everything our fathers did, but we are reminded of what they said because we repeat it to our own children. That's not always a good thing, but hopefully your filter is fully engaged.
Remember next time you are speaking to someone, anyone, the importance of your words. They matter more than you think. Remember to say "please" and "thank you." Remember to praise publicly and criticize privately. Remember that you never know when you are part of a life-changing moment so act as if you always are.
Emily Dickinson, my favorite poet, whom I named my daughter after said it best:
A WORD is dead
When it is said,
Some say.
I say it just
Begins to live
That day
Once spoken, your words go on and on. Make them count.
- Adolfo
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It's hard to overstate the importance of words. Words from a president can lead to war or sink global markets. Words of encouragement from a parent or a teacher can give a kid a much needed boost. Words from a spouse can encourage, or wound. Words from a child can overwhelm you, or simply leave you laughing or shaking your head.
Think back to an important moment in your life. You will always remember the words that marked the occasion. If you have had a life-changing moment, it is likely because of something someone said to you. We may not remember everything our fathers did, but we are reminded of what they said because we repeat it to our own children. That's not always a good thing, but hopefully your filter is fully engaged.
Remember next time you are speaking to someone, anyone, the importance of your words. They matter more than you think. Remember to say "please" and "thank you." Remember to praise publicly and criticize privately. Remember that you never know when you are part of a life-changing moment so act as if you always are.
Emily Dickinson, my favorite poet, whom I named my daughter after said it best:
A WORD is dead
When it is said,
Some say.
I say it just
Begins to live
That day
Once spoken, your words go on and on. Make them count.
- Adolfo
Start building your Success Library!
Follow me on Twitter
Friend me on Facebook
Follow A Year Without News
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