Day # 93 - Q1 Results

I am a quarter of the way through A Year Without News. I can honestly say I have changed, improved. But as long as I'm being honest, I have to say I have a long way to go.

I have improved in the following ways:

- I gave up caffeine. I have been steadfast in this. I have proven to myself that I don't need it. If you think you need it you are wrong. I am still up every morning by five and I am still as energetic (fidgety) as ever. I have the same results without the addiction.

- I am more active. I went to the Y last week four times to swim laps. I know I have a long way to go. I promised myself that by the end of the year, I would be below 200 pounds. This morning, I will be at the Y taking a spin class.

- I am healthier. Because of the commitment to improve myself, I am eating better overall. Don't get me wrong, I am not going vegan. Animals taste good and God placed them on the planet for us to enjoy. However, I have reduced the salty McBurgers and other crap I used to eat daily. I understand that there is no sense improving my mind and keeping it in a rotten body.

- I am more patient. This has always been a challenge for me. Now, this doesn't mean I am any more willing to swallow nonsense. In fact, I think I am more likely to spit it right back at whomever is feeding it to me. But I am learning not to sweat the things I can't control. I am learning to ignore people who bring nothing but aggravation.

- My temper is more under control. I won't say completely under control because I still lose it now and then, but not as often and not in the extreme way I used to.

- I curse less than I used to. I am not completely rid of four-letter words, but *(#$$% ####*(*^^ give me a chance! I'm working on it!!!

- My focus is improving. I am still an ADD kid, but I'm getting better. Where was I going with this? Oh, well. You get the point.

So is it worth it? I will answer this question again at the end of the Year. I will probably answer it again at the end of each quarter. And I am sure that my answer will always be the same as it is today: Yes!

Find what's holding you back. Find the anchor hanging around your neck, and cut it away. Let go of the hurts of your past. Let go of negative people. Let go of destructive relationships. Let go of anger. Go confidently in the direction of your dreams. Endeavour to live the life you have imagined.

- Adolfo


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Day # 92 - Odds and Ends

Very busy day yesterday. I'm sure there were lessons in there, but I'm just trying to figure out what they are.

One lesson, and I've discussed it before, is that God will never bless you with more until you take care of what you already have. He wants you to be ready to receive the blessing. We've all read stories about people winning the lottery and ending up broke again. This is why God wants you to be ready. He won't make you ready, that part is up to you. It's part of what I love about God: He will give you everything, but he'll let you screw up, too. He respects free will.

Another, which comes from Yogi Berra, is that it ain't over until it's over. The deal I wrote about a couple of weeks ago, a very time sensitive takeover of an existing business, is ongoing. Today was supposed to be the deadline, but we have gotten the parties involved to cooperate while our investor is out of the country. Of course, he's in Cuba, may as well be on Mars because calling Cuba is practically impossible. My partner and I are in the middle of a four-way negotiation and we have two of those sides working with us. The third party will work with us once he returns to the planet. The point is that you have to be patient and flexible. Make relationships with the people you are dealing with and things will always go smoother.

From Melissa's teacher I was reminded that we need to see the good and the bad. She told us how her son once confessed to being nervous about getting a B in his schoolwork because she would only focus on the grades below A. She had never noticed what she was doing but it was hurting the kid. So especially with your kids, praise when it is earned, constructively criticize when it is warranted. Also, praise publicly, criticize privately.


God bless you. Make it a great day.

- Adolfo

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Day # 91 - Make your choice

Rough day yesterday. No doubt about it. All sorts of trouble with the house. Other trouble too, stuff I'd rather not discuss. That's not why I'm up. I was out late meeting with some prospective clients and ate dinner later than I should have, went to bed earlier than I'm used to and here I am.

I met with a fan club yesterday. I am wooing them. I would like them to come to my bar for game watching parties. They are bound by their love of sports and one team in particular, one I have never been a fan of. But I have to say their enthusiasm for the sport and their loyalty to their team is inspiring.

So I met with these folks and had a great time chatting with them. All the while, the trouble of the day was weighing heavily on me. But as I chatted with them, as I enjoyed their company, I felt the weight lifting and I was able to remind myself that no matter what, it's all temporary. It only lasts forever if you want it to. This is the point of today's post.

There is good and there is bad every day. You decide which to focus on. I have friends who only focus on the bad. I actually have one who won't answer or return my calls because I had to reschedule a visit. Never mind how much I've done for this person in the past, their focus is on the one negative thing. I don't call this person any more. We may never speak again and you know... I'm fine with that. I don't need the drama.

I could have allowed the bad news to ruin everything for me or I could have a good time. I chose a good time. There will always be challenges. If I let them get the better of me, I will always come out losing. I chose to win.

Remember, every day gives you choices. You make your choice and decide what kind of day you will have. Do this every day and soon enough you will have decided what kind of life you're going to have. And that's what it's all about.

God bless you. Make it your best day yet.

- Adolfo

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Day # 90 - Isaiah 31 or something like that.

Last night I read my bible for a while. I am no biblical scholar. I'm not a scholar of any type. But I know when God is speaking to me - and lately He's been shouting!

For too long, I have refused to learn from my mistakes. I have become too comfortable, too fat and lazy for my own good (like an elected official.) Well, He decided it was time for me to learn my lesson.

Example 1:

I have a knack for making money. Not millions (yet) but I always find a way to make a buck. So when I lost my job and went seven months without work, and then my business fell by 90% because of the economy and the unusually cold winter, I should have learned my lesson. By the way, shouldn't both of my issues been avoided with the stimulus and global warming? No? Maybe I missed the memo. My life should have been extremely rough during those seven months, but it wasn't. Everything was fine. I hustled, kept earning a little money here and there and I was fine. Now, I am working and things should be back to normal, but I find this isn't exactly the case. God is making sure I learn my lesson.

Example 2:

I've owned my house for seven years. Like most homeowners, I started out taking great care of it but lately, I have kind of abandoned it. I haven't taken care of it the way I should. Now, the house is complaining.

I feel like I'm being spanked in a cosmic sense. My butt is not sore, but I am hurting.

I am not whining or complaining. I am simply making an observation and sharing it. It's important to listen to the still small voice in your hear, the feeling in your gut. When your thoughts wake you at three in the morning, listen to them. There is wisdom in the morning breeze.

My interpretation of Isaiah 31 was that God helps those who help themselves and that those who look to the government or blame everyone else will get nothing. I am sure bible scholars would tell me I am wide of the mark. That's fine. This worked for me and helped me see what I needed to see. The development of Adolfo Jimenez took a big step today.

God bless you, make it your best day yet.

-Adolfo


http://bible.cc/isaiah/31-1.htm

http://www.honeybeepartyrental.com
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Day # 89 - The 40-Hour Work Weak!

There are no perfect situations. Each situation, good or bad, is what you make of it. You decide whether it's a good day or a bad day. You decide if that email from your boss will ruin your evening or your weekend or even part of your vacation. We live in the 24-hour world so it's easy for work and its aggravations to follow you home. You need to decide whether that's acceptable or not.

I work practically around the clock. I sleep around six hours and will start the morning by checking emails, which is how I end my day. I have been up since five this morning (it's now 5:27) and here I am writing my blog, which is work. I will make and take a few calls after dropping off the kids this morning. In fact, I have a collection call to make. It shouldn't be unpleasant, but it's never fun to ask for money, even if it is owed to you.

But let's be honest: no one ever built a successful career or business working forty hours per week. As Brian Tracy said, "The forty hour work-week is the worst bill of goods ever sold to the American people." He's right. While I believe in work-life balance, I believe that if you want to have more, you have to do more. 40 is the number of survival.

I have a full-time plus job (about 60 hours including work done at home via Crackberry and laptop) I own a business, which takes little time, a few hours a week. I write this blog, and I serve on a couple of community boards. I also find time to network. I also read about a book a week. How can I achieve work-life balance? Simple:

I choose what my life should be. I don't watch television anymore. I disconnected the cable. I should have done it years ago. I don't miss it. My kids are more active and less sarcastic because they're not trying to make the same wise remarks I-Carly or Hannah Montana pass off as humor. I also limit my social activities, trying to do as many of them as possible during work hours. I rarely go out for a drink (once or twice a year - yes, year.) I don't have a regular poker game I attend. I don't spend my Sundays glued to the television watching football. I do watch the Dolphins and some times a couple more games, but I don't obsess about it. And now that I don't have cable, that' probably over. I don't sleep in and I don't demand me time. I make "me" time. I do it by waking up 90 minutes before anyone else in the house.

How to achieve work-life balance:

- Prioritize: Eliminate what really doesn't matter, like TV.
- Schedule: There is a time for work and a time for family- if you make it so.
- Live in the Now!: When you are at work, work. When you are at play, play. You'll get more work done, and you'll get more joy out of the time spent with family and friends.

The truth is, I only know what works for me. I am done with my morning work and I still have about 30 minutes to myself before the morning insanity starts. I'll drop off the kids, go get a quick workout, and get to work. When I am at work, I will focus on work. Then I'm going to get a haircut. I really need one.

God bless you and make it a great day.

- Adolfo



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Day # 88 - A Little Friendly Competition

Back in June, I announced I would give up caffeine. I have. As you see, it hasn't affected me, because it's 5:29AM as I write this and I've been up for a while. My life has improved. More importantly, my children are pretty much at zero caffeine. We serve water with every meal in the house now. I also gave up fast food for the most part. There have been a couple of lapses, but I try to go with the best choices. Abby is also losing weight and changing her eating habits. In fact, she is at the YMCA pool right now. Tomorrow morning it's my turn for an early morning swim.

For ten years we have been one another's enabler. One of us would take our health seriously and the other wouldn't be interested or supportive. Now, we have made a game of it. Every morning we are on the Wii Fit Plus weighing ourselves, congratulating one another on our progress. We go walking, swimming, or bowling. We have eliminated junk food from the house. Abby is a great baker (it was the family business a few years back) and has been experimenting with new recipes, but most of it is out the door to our testers so we don't see it or we see very little of it. Small disciplines are adding up to big differences.

Of course, there is the trash talking. We challenge one another constantly. I keep reminding her that I am the superior athlete and she reminds me of her superior will power. We never hurt one another. We each have a vested interest in the other's success, so we're just having fun and keeping each other motivated.

It's hard to change your life without someone to be accountable to. I've tried it several times and failed. 88 days into this and I feel accountable to the readers of this blog. I feel accountable to my parents and mostly to my children, who deserve a healthy father. Mostly, though, I am accountable to myself. I owe it to myself to be my best. God has blessed me with two hands, two arms, two legs and feet, not too bad of a brain in my head. For me not to use everything I have to the best of my ability would be a sin. Sadly, it is a sin committed by millions and millions of people every day. Are you one of them? If so, I challenge you to make one little change. Maybe less TV, more exercise, giving up alcohol. Work a little harder. Save more money. For me, it started with giving up news and it is compounding daily. The same can happen to you. 277 days to go and who knows where I'll land!

Today's Lessons:

- We are all competitive to some degree (or should be) so make a competition out of your goals, even if it's the person you want to be competing against the person you used to be.

- Be accountable to someone. Whatever you're trying to accomplish, find a buddy. Join a Meetup group or get together with some friends or co-workers, and be the voice in each other's ear.

- Don't be afraid to engage in a little friendly smack talking. Always respectful, of course.

- Make a competition out of goals and then make a game of competition.

Today's Declarations:

- Day by day in every way I am getting better and better.

- I am working toward my goals and I am focused.

- I am unstoppable.
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Day # 87 - Being here

We're in the pool at the Y. Emily is floating on her back. She's a little nervous and wants to be able to feel me near her as she lays there with her eyes closed. She ask me not to leave her alone. I wouldn't dream of leaving her alone, and all I can think to say is, "Daddy's here."

At the end of the pool, there's a man who came with his kids. His kids are roughhousing and the lifeguard keeps blowing her whistle at them. The "father" is on the phone, oblivious to his kids.

I understand the importance of work. I know sometimes you have to take calls at inconvenient times, but what could be more important than your kids and what time could be more inconvenient to take a phone call than the little time spent with them? Had he any intention of being "there" he would not have had his phone. It would have been in his gym bag or hidden under his shirt. Frankly, I would have preferred for his furry back to be hidden under his shirt, but that's a whole other column.

The simple words I told my daughter, "Daddy's here," meant the world to her. She knew she was safe. She knew there was someone nearby who loves her more than anyone else loves her and that no matter what, she was going to be protected. I started thinking about how many kids never hear those words. I think about how many kids barely know their fathers and how many have never met their fathers. What poor excuse for a man could live with himself under those circumstances?

Any man can take a woman to bed. It's the easiest thing in the world. You don't even have to do it well to create a child. It requires no license or screening. It requires nothing but a willingness to engage in pleasurable behavior. Gee, tall order.

Our society has almost made fathers irrelevant. I remember when I was a single dad and people would see me with my sons. The would tell me how great it was that I was there for my kids. My answer was always, "Where else would I be if not there for my children?" It was always my feeling that I didn't deserve praise for being a father any more than an employee deserves praise for showing up to work. I do, however, believe that deadbeat dads should be humiliated. I believe their faces should be plastered on billboards across America. It's not a privacy issue. When a man fails to be a man, we pick up the tab in the form of welfare, food stamps, W.I.C. and the like. When that kid ends up in jail, and he is more likely to end up in jail, we are the victims of his crimes and we get to pay the bill for his housing and sustenance.

The point of this is that something as simple as being there can make all the difference in the world. Sure, a man must deal with his financial obligations to his kids, but being a father is priceless and the returns are astronomical. While there are exceptions, Barack Obama being the most notable, most kids who grow up without a father don't make it out of high school, much less through Harvard.

The lesson today is that kids need fathers. While it's become fashionable to be a single mother, there is no doubt that a kid is better with two parents. Fathers are the model for the man their sons will become and the man their daughters will marry. Don't you want that person to be a man of honor?

God bless you and may you be a blessing to your children. Make it your best day yet.

- Adolfo

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