Day # 15 - It's hard to say so long. Call me crazy.

So I spent a little time yesterday working on my farewell speech. Today (Thursday June 10) is my last day as chairman of the Dania Beach Chamber of Commerce. We're hosting our quarterly breakfast this morning and swearing in our new board of directors. I will no longer be chair, but I will assume the post of immediate past chair. It's not as bureaucratic as it sounds. It's a great organization and I will miss being at the top of it.

As I prepared my comments, I had to make decisions that, to a more emotionally mature person, should have been easy. I had to decide whether to take this opportunity to strike back at the people who have criticized, ambushed, bad-mouthed, or sabotaged me throughout my term. Sadly, I haven't always been a high-road kind of guy.

Dania Beach City Commissioner Walter Duke likes to say the four rules of public speaking are: Speak from the heart, be brief, be brief, sit down. It's the first rule I'm struggling with. I agree that one should always speak from the heart, but I know that hearts are not always filled with love. Sometimes there are other feelings in there. Sometimes, there is pain.

So, do I take the high road? Or do I come down on them with the fury of a thousand suns?

Neither.

Living well is the best revenge. For every criticism, every personal attack, I have received countless compliments, pats on the back, and congratulations. I can rightfully be proud of the work my board, staff, and I have done.

***

So, as a result of the 365 without news project, I am spending less time in front of the TV. Yesterday, there was about five minutes spent watching a documentary about tribes in New Guinea. I think it was New Guinea. Either way, I fell asleep as soon as I turned the TV on, so I have no idea what I watched. If I learned anything, it was through osmosis.

What I can say is, you should try it. My sister told me I would eventually give up all TV if I quit news. I am not ready to say I am never going to watch TV again, but I can say that I found more time to read (more on that in a minute) and to take care of some personal business. And most importantly, time with the family.

Most of what I used to watch on TV is negative. Aside from news, which is designed to make people depressed or angry or suicidal -or so it seems- most of the shows on TV are about conflict. Now, you're probably saying life is about conflict. I disagree, but I also thought TV was supposed to be an escape, why do I want to sit there watching people pretending to have more problems than me. Why do I want to watch people getting divorced when I have a marriage I want to see thrive. I don't believe it is inevitable that my kids will give me problems in their teen years. I don't believe that global warming will eventually destroy the planet. I don't want to hear about the oil spills, and the terrorists, and the rapists. I don't want to hear about people walking into restaurants and shooting innocent people. I don't want to watch the "real" housewives of wherever bad-mouthing one another and then air-kissing at cocktail parties. By the way, they all have jobs, they are not housewives.

People would call me crazy for giving up on TV. That's like calling someone crazy for giving up heroin.

I read, "The Greatest Salesman in the World" a couple of years ago. I hadn't read it since and decided to read it yesterday. It's funny how I had to tell myself to ignore the book's obvious flaws in order to get something out of the time investment I was making. The book is poorly written - of this there is no doubt. But the message is a good one. And these days, I am all about the message. I read one thing in there that applies to the situation with my detractors at the chamber:

"Always will I dig for reasons to applaud. Never will I scratch for reasons to gossip."

In other words: If you have nothing nice to say about a person, keep looking until you find it. Digging versus scratching. It's much more work, you get your hands dirty, but your conscience remains clean. What a great line.

Lessons:

- Time spent preparing is time spent reflecting.
- Emotional maturity equals happiness.
- Take the high road. You'll be less likely to run into people who want to hurt you.
- Try a day without TV, you will suddenly have time and a better outlook. (Radio, too!)

Declarations:

Day by day, in every way, I am getting better and better.
Today, I will take the high road.
I will persist until I succeed.
I will laugh at the world.

The last two are from "The Greatest Salesman in the World." Use them. Say them out loud. Repeat them. You are getting better. You are becoming the person you were meant to be. I believe in you. Now it's time you believed in yourself.

God bless you,

Adolfo

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