Day # 29 - It's all in the approach

No matter what you do in your life, from ordering lunch to asking that special person on a date. your approach will do more to determine the outcome than you know. By approach, I mean your mental state, your attitude, eye contact, posture, demeanor and body language.

- Mental State: Clear your mind, focus on the goal. Eyes on the prize. If you walk into a situation where making the right impression is important and your mind is elsewhere, you will not be able to perform. Be in the moment.
- Attitude: Be positive positive positive and positive, and always be confident. There's nothing else to be said about that.
- Eye contact: When you make good eye contact, it shows you are confident, sincere, and have nothing to hide. I don't mean you stare at a person's eyes like a boxer before a match, but don't fail to hold a glance. Your eyes say more than your mouth ever could.
- Demeanor: Be pleasant. Don't be a grouch or a slouch, and don't be a used car salesman. Listen more than you talk and when you talk, don't brag, don't whine, and don't complain.
- Body language: Remember when your mother would tell you to stand up straight? She was right. Do it.

Why am I telling you this? I am a believer in networking. I think it's a great way to grow your business and social life. But your approach has to be correct. I am not telling you to not be yourself. On the contrary, the less lies you tell, the less you have to remember. By all means, be yourself.

If you are ever in a room full of strangers and need to make friends, these bits of advice will help you. (More on that at another time.)

I am thinking about an event I recently attended where one of the attendees approached me about getting business from my company and the chamber of commerce. Their approach was to complain and point out that their competitor was getting more business than they were. This person pointed out that there were people who didn't treat them nice or say hello. I wasn't feeling very well and so couldn't bring out the correct words of advice - so I am writing them.

It wasn't bad enough that I was told all this, the person went and repeated the same story to other chamber members. You want a bad reputation? Whine. Repeat. I would never betray this person's confidence, but not everyone is like me.

The approach is never to complain. If you feel you're not getting your fair share, analyze the situation and figure out why. 99% of the time, the problem is you. There is no conspiracy. You're clueless or you're not working hard enough. End of story.

Lessons:

- It's all in the approach.
- Analyze your situation. Find the problem and solve it.
- Work harder and smarter.
- Quit complaining.

Today's Declarations:

- Day by day in every way I am getting better and better.
- Today I will change my approach to life.
- I will be a worker, not a complainer.
- I will analyze situations to find the problems and fix them.

With the right attitude, everything gets better and easier. Change the way you look at things, and the things you look at will change. This is true. I can testify to that. Some day I will. When the words are right.

Make it your best day yet. God bless you.


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